You smell like stripper and shame
How long do you need to date somebody until it is acceptable to fart in their presence?
The real question is how long do you need to date them to dutch oven them?
I learned his name tonight. This now makes him a real person. Obviously, I no longer want to sleep with him.
I introduced him to the male G-Spot. Don't ever tell me I'm not experienced.
No one wears that much makeup to work unless they are trying to fuck their boss, NO ONE
the threesome consisted of him fingering dana while i laid next to them watching how i met your mother.
he asked you how you felt and you yelled "I FEEL SO PROACTIVE!" and started coloring with sharpies
My ex best friend's ex fuck buddy is visiting. There was no other option but day drinking.
Please please please tell me that is not a pringles container full of pee that your little brother just got a hold of.....
i think that after ALREADY drinking that much, the tube shots may have been a bad idea.. i mean afterall, i did wake up and find my cell phone IN the bonfire the next morning.
you know it's a good party when the fucking floor caves in. THE FUCKING FLOOR.
Fuck you asshole. You cost me cheerleader pussy.
literally 50% of my time being 20 has involved my genitals thus far
Is there one of me peeing? If so do I look bangable in it
I would rather contract a disease that would eat me from the inside out and make me suffer painfully while it slowly killed me than to put myself through the 20 minutes of agony that is having sex with you ever ever again.
I think you're talking dirty but I'm not sure???
Randomize