...is it true? will i see you next weekend
YES.
ah, i can't wait till there's negative 2 inches between us
This is your Morning Wood Report: I have it.
he used his one phone call on me and it said "you have a collect call from- LETS GET IT- at the montgomery county jail".
I probably shouldn't have followed up that rainbow sherbet with beef jerky. This is a whole new level of fat, even for me.
my host sister just stared at me as i knocked over the lamp, then took out all my chocolate, walked into the bathroom, and locked the door. i'm officially the worst exchange student ever.
She's legit crying about wanting more sex. Holy shit.
I remember tearing his shower curtain down but I don't remember trying to shave my vag...
The face that yo gabba gabba comes up when I'm stoned and searching for yoga workouts is scary or dangerous
By the way. I expect to test the theory of you running a mile drunk for memorial day.
Come to wine Wednesday bro. We have a fog machine
Gotta get new sheets. ..I fucked the satin off mine.
It must have been good head...he put down the Xbox controller
Did this whole conversation happen while you were shitting?
Welcome to your 30’s, where every one night stand is most likely with someone’s father
We're on our way. We couldn't find our clothes this morning, so we're driving your car half naked. You owe me a cigarette.
Randomize
