we dont know what were doing after yet. first up we have 90 beers and a party kit and fun hats.
fuck you guys, stop putting fake babies in my car the cops came again.
I actually had no interest in him until he started talking about his 4 arrests. That made him go from a 5 1/2 to a 8, easily.
so I'm in athletic shorts, a suit jacket and I'm still drunk at 6:30am at the last leg of relay for life
his fiance had made him a calendar of pictures of her. he asked if he should take it down and i said no. i wanted her to watch.
Somebody was walking their dog with their car. seriously
relax...and go to your happy place, which probably has a lot of dicks
If she wants to think that freshman 15 means sleeping with 15 guys than so be it I just gotta make sure I'm one of them.
i just feel like it would be irresponsible for you to not have sex with me again.
My vagina agrees.
just passed out again, this time at a subway. On a positive not they gave me a free sandwich, pretty sure out pity but at this point i don't care
Your lower body and my face have had way too much contact lately.
He fucked a girl named Oreo... He deserved syphilis.
You're not on my level until you shop at Petsmart for sex accessories.
I had to wash my hair with conditioner because my sister got hammered and gave the dog a 3am sprinkler bath with my shampoo.
So "I hate myself Mondays" has extended to Tuesday this week. I just had peanut butter and a glass of wine for lunch.
Randomize
