super hot butfun
Oops. What a difference a comma and a space make.
Dude. I tried to convince her to eat poprocks and give me a blowjob. It did not work out well.
I found him crying and drunk, in my closet holding a picture of Tyler Perry. He managed to say"he's just so many people"
i drank out of my shoe...were you seriously expecting me to be the voice of reason?
She is feeding us popcorn out of her bra
she gave me one of those friendship bracelets and said as long as I wore it it was like an all-access pass to her vagina
Depending upon how the Sox game progresses, I'll either cry on the bar or fuck someone tonight...
Until she magically finds a brain, I'm going to be a dick. Fair trade. She's a idiot, I'm an ass.
Just found a condom on my floor from last weekend. 2/2. The scavenger hunt is over.
I've finally done it, I've downloaded some messenger lesbians like to use because some girl wanted to flirt.
Congrats, you're all grown up now.
I FEEL LIKE A GAY BUTTERFLY
So changing channels while she's on top is frowned upon. It's back to thinking about baseball again.
Someone needs to lock me in a chastity belt because all my vagina does is get me into trouble. Fuck.
It took me an hour to walk from my drive way to my front door... what the fuck was in that weed?
First time a guy goes down on me and his dog had its head on my knee the whole time. I swear it was judging me.
As a member of the kink community, I feel grossly misrepresented
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