im gay
i know
yea but for you.
i think blowjobs on the first date are perfectly acceptable. as long as you dont go dick to mouth.
I'm done trying to be a vegetarian. My vagina smells like hummus.
And next time, don't pick a fight with me when you're naked. That's just not fair
You're having sex and i just smoked and made oatmeal...i'll give you some time to be jealous
If you dedicate your next bite to me, I'll dedicate my first orgasm to you.
areolas are like halos for boobs.
i think maybe i'll just not watch it. i'd rather not think of you as a magical transforming set of dick holes.
sorry bout that man. went out to pay the pizza boy, ended up hooking up with some random drunk girl that thought i was someone else
When did we convert life to cartoon?
before the moonshine you were already braiding the bouncers beard -_-
How drunk do you guys plan on getting?
We wrote our addresses on our arms for the cab driver, what do you think?
I'm drinking with a guy who apparently blew my dog sitter.
I need to wear something that says I would have sex with you but I'm not going to
I literally ate pizza on a toilet and made up reasons as to why you should make out with that boy. I am unstoppable.
I heard Enya coming from steve’s room. I am too high to handle this sudden depth of character
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