it was terrible. i could've done a better job by myself.
Well his aunt was in the next room so we had to be quiet. I felt like i was on an episode of silent library.
He invited me to see "alison wonderland" WHAT THE FUCK THATS NOT A FIRST NAME/LAST NAME TYPE DEAL
oh god was she eating orange peels again
I'm spoon feeding myself tequila for breakfast, should we skip class today?
I am lonely and I want to touch your beard
Just tapped my penis on the head and said "this will be your year buddy."
So the " I'm gay but curious" thing worked. You owe me 50 bucks.
It wasn't a mystery that it was the pizza cooking in the oven when we stumbled out of the bedroom in a smoke filled apartment at 2am. We are dangerous drunks
that pic of me and the hulking football player sure does come in handy when creepy guys hit on me at the bar.
Next year, please remind me not to be at a damn Super Bowl party with screaming children whose parents can't control them. I will sell the little suckers to the fucking circus passing through town.
I thought since you asked to see my dick I might as well say hi
I recall trading my iPhone watch for a carton of Marlboros.
Best part though was when he wanted to cuddle and I was like, I'm going to go.
fucked one of the teachers, librarian job's going great
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