okay, this is the fifth time he asked if it was in yet. maybe i shouldn't have dated a blind guy.
so i decided to listen to you and went ahead and slept with him. you owe me 3 minutes
She made me add her as a friend on fb before she got into my bed... I sense a stalker
She was so happy she found her sunglasses, that she blew me. Im now randomly hiding things of hers in hopes she'll find them and I'll get a repeat performance.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
I negotiated the purchase of an entire tray of like 50 jello shots for $8.
on the way to the hospital you kept asking if we could stop at the bar first. then you proceeded to puke out the window
Security said no more parties of this kind. To me that translates to Theme party this weekend.
Someday. I cant very well invite myself to his dorm room. And I'm 28. The excuses to be drunk and running into him at uconn are rather slim. Although I'm working on it.
You are the alcoholic guardian angel of raccoons
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Want to come over and play therapist and then fuck all the emotion away?
Currently hot boxing a fort I made on our snow day... This is legendary
We just banged and he's microwaving shrimp noodles and I'm eating tostitos alone in the dark this is why our relationship works
He just compared our sex to a grand slam on Wii fitness
You're doing it right
The moment when you go to plug in someone else's phone in your car and your lube is in the way. Don't mind that it's just my center console car lube. Normal.
Your liver needs more exercise - we start training tonight.
Randomize