My boobs aren't big enough for this kind of lifestyle
Wow.. I was doing a mental check of my bank balance & I literally just said to myself: 'I have 27 dollars and a bottle of tequila til tuesday-ill be fine'
i walked into the first stall,, but there was no paper, so i'm in the other one. a little kid is in the one without paper now and is making a lot of noise. curious how this'll turn out for him.
By the way, she says hi. At least I think she did since she licked my phone
It was mandatory to shotgun a beer before we were allowed to eat dinner
Woke up un the hot tuv. Climbed out fo the hot tub and fell asleeo. Woke ip again in the hot tub.
im just sayin im driving an hr to pick her up, just cause shes your gf doesnt mean i shouldnt be entitled to a bj
Just found puke on my backpack while sitting in class. It's like this weekend won't leave me alone.
Oh I forgot to tell you that while you were in the bathroom last night I made friends with a gay man named Rodger from Venezuela and he kissed me cheek and told me I "knew how to shake my thing". From now on we go to the bathroom as a team.
I can't in good conscience help you bag a Catholic girl who isn't at least a 7.
Starting the weekend with a pair of pants on which the zipper wont stay up. Is this a sign of things to come??
Nah, just ran around, pinned random men to walls, bit their lips of and booked it.
Yeah, we agreed, but I feel like I need at least one more ride on the bonecoaster
So you don't take a regular pic with her, but you take a selfie with her ass. Interesting...
I'm talking to a corgi on tinder..wtf has my life come to
Randomize
