your profile still reads that you like women...interesting? I think there is some photography and video that will show otherwise
i guess that's what happens when you find your girlfriend at the zoo
Immaculate conception is definitely the most boring way to conceive a child.
i made sure i dropped the whole "im a yoga teacher" bomb which basically roofies a guys sense of judgement and guarantees he will sleep with me.
Party at my house. Liquor pinata. Your presence is required.
he aimed his bare ass at the sparkler, farted, and it really did work...i love 4th of july anal fire works
where's my purse there's an important taco in it
nothing says roomie bonding better than a sunday shroom trip.
It sounds like I am drunk, but I am not. I just have a concussion.
He tried to make small talk to hide the fact that he was struggling to unhook my bra... at least he tried right?
Why is there no Netflix category for "I just wanna cry, but I don't have time for a whole romcom"?
He was dressed as the 420 Easter bunny...he looked like a walking anti-drug campaign.
She's the perfect storm of great hair, big boobs, intellectualism, and mild moral ambiguity.
In local news "Man Stabbed With Golf Club" next person who tells me this is a safe place to live gets punched...
a guy just skateboarded past my window in a bunny suit while chased by a dog walker
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