Ed hardy makes air fresheners now. Now even the air can be a douchebag.
and she said "My body is an orphanage, I take everybody in"...
I was pretty stoned. I thought I needed a seatbelt at the restaurant.
With the way things had been going, I was never more excited for a person to cum
Is it love? I honestly haven't even thought about watching porn for over a week now, and haven't thought about fucking any strangers either. It's quite eerie.
So..he has a girlfriend BUT she rarely writes on her wall and is only in 5 of his 371 tagged photos and her default pic is her with some other dude. It cant be serious
Oh my god you need to get off of facebook.
If you want me to retract my crazy cat lady comments pictures of yourself dressed as a cat are not the way to do it.
I've honestly never felt so much emotion towards a wall
Stoned in some guys basement listening to ELO. it's like its 1978.
What good is being a girl if you can't terrorize boys with pregnancy scares??
It's important to establish I slept with her BEFORE we officially became cousins-in-law.
If you saw or spoke to me yesterday can you message me. Trying to make a timeline of the day I was too drunk to remember
Man, coughing on your period is like the biggest gamble a girl can make.
I AM SO HORNY, I AM GOING TO DIE. I NEED SOMEONE TO WISH MY VAGINA A MERRY CHRISTMAS.
I already plan to donate my brain to science so they can attempt to fully understand the complexities of my existence
Randomize
