After work we went home to fool around. Turns out he had sawdust under his foreskin. I'm never going down on him again.
Found out my brother is now my eskimo brother...One of my proudest times as a brother
weed salsa. i deserve a nobel prize
I will be sticking my dick in something this weekend. You can either be that something or not. Your decision.
Jesus christ it's been two texts and we are already talking about dildos
Old woman told me I looked like her son and then she started explaining to me how she wanted me to fuck her
On a not really funny at all but kinda brighter note I've gotten really good at texting in hand cuffs
In the middle of having sex she stopped, said "guess what, it's clitoris awareness week" and then continued fucking me
I got slapped by a drag queen and bitten on the arm by either a random girl or a weird mouth shaped dog. Tough to tell without seeing the teeth
I'm a college student and my dad gets more ass than I do..... do you see a problem here?
i need some magic done to my vagina
With great boredom comes great irresponsibility.
Please tell me you're not on their roof again..
also, when i showed up he started talking to me and eventually asked me if the girls treated me well. i went on to talk about my sex life. he was talking about his secretaries.
Tonight’s your last chance for a danger free blowjob.
you should just get a floor plan of your dorm and start checking off rooms.
Randomize
