It's going to be great. They guy at the store said 3 shots and you won't be able to feel your face or stop smiling.
Just took my pill on time for two days in a row. I deserve a prize.
Not having phil's child is good enough.
Apparently I gave him a 'Steve jobs blowjob'
i will be blacked out in the shower. come get me. 20 mins.
They're putting plan B in vending machines now. My life just got so much easier.
I may or may not have had sex last night then sent him home on a bike with two flats
Use "feeling words"
Yay
Is he the circus guy or the bi-curious street preacher?
Aka reading hardcore gay robot porn as a steady trickle of elementary schoolers walk by me every so often and im still in uniform as there councilor
Who is also still dressed up as a pirate
Would it be wrong to text my ex and say "congratulations on the new baby that you had with a stripper"?
One of my pillows is missing but it's cool because there is a beef stick.
i smell like vinegar and tequila i can feel the old people behind me judging
Lady at the airport across from me just pulled a cat out of her bag. can't deal with this right now..
So I realize somewhere between mildly irritated and outright belligerently pissed is where you are, but as to location, where are you?
And here I am, playing fetch with my cat at two in the morning.
Randomize
