Happy Easter!!!
I'm an idiot
They're all gay and their wifi network is named HOMOS. I want to live with these people.
I just puked in my fish tank. Helloooooo summer.
You started a dance party so that you could steal their vodka and shouted "sailors out!"
I just find it funny that nobody ever threatens to call the cops on us until we have a Harry Potter party
I kept resisting the urge to yell "2 for 2!" so they could hear me on the other side of the wall.
You threw a shot glass at the bartender and still managed to convince him to let us drink more. You are my hero.
Date idea: we should go to the store and buy all the different kinds of Lay's and eat them all
Dude, I traded weed for crunch berries. Happy Thursday.
Some girl dressed in nothing but Wonder Woman underwear and a cape on her ass just started twerking all over us. Remind me why I'd never been to a midnight of Rocky horror before?
I think I fell in love with her when I saw her kick a freshman in the chest
Hooked up with a 20 year old. Only reason I did was cos I thought he was 18
I can now say I know getting hit in the face with a flying tortilla is not fun
I will not go because I am a man of my word and of my penis.
Sorry I totally pulled a home invasion on you last night
That was super inconsiderate of me
Randomize
