high people should be assigned attendants
Going to a jewelry store high is not a good idea. I look like mr.t's wife.
I am not deleting the internet history anymore, now I am going for shock value.
Who would have sex with her? She looks like she shops at baby gap
there was a 40 knocked over. chips and salsa all over the floor. and she was in her thong doing boot camp on demand in the middle of the room..
How do I invite him to our 4th of July cookout without sounding too much like "hey you were my first orgasm and I want your dick inside my while watching fireworks"
Waking up in a pool chair wrapped in toilet paper is not what I planned when I agreed to movie night
I don't know how I feel about the stuff we got from that guy. Me and Monty are driving through town listening to static at full blast...
Tell Chris I said sorry for yelling "It's my vagina, let me do what I want with it!" at the party last night.
Okay I take that back some girl just said pussy sweat. Get me outta here
Hot dogs and hydrocodine is NOT the combo of champions
I knew you were cut off when you tried to order a "Phil Collins"
He said it only counts if it ends up on the internet
Just had a reminder come up that just said "Ham"
My hands smell like penis... I can't even remember the last time i touched a penis, but my hands say i did. Oh the mystery.
Randomize
