i am pregamming alone in my car. scale of 1-10 how alcoholic is that
im pretty sure thats an 11
There's a girl in my class named "La-a" pronouced "Luh Dash uh" I hate everyone
guess what. just found out I had mono. no wonder alcohol didn't taste good on nye
you came back at 4am in a suit jacket and a half eaten burrito...
Don't EVER smell your tampon
i secretly love the power trip of being their RA & busting these idiots for everything i did as a freshman
second attempt at shower sex: failed after the water turned orange bc of a fire up the street. this is just not meant to be
I'm sitting at home, day drinking, while watching crossroads with brittany spears. I'm not the person you should be asking for advice right now.
don't pay it forward
I eont pay shit forward. told a stranger to call an abulance and peaced
I'm wearing the monkey suit out tonight. I hope you're ok with it leaving the bedroom
Did my married ex-boyfriend really tell me that he prays for me? Fucking Judas
I settled on "Merry Christmas! Btw you may have chlamydia". I thought a nice holiday greeting would soften the blow
I'm looking for whatever I can find, and afford without having to eat my emotional support cat
My arm is completely dead, never again will i give you a 20 minute hand job. You better have enjoyed that asshole. I have to text with my left hand now.
i only got to wear my halloween costume for an half hour before it got taken off.
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