i just realized Britney Spears and I are more alike than I thought. Both of us have our parents in complete control of our lives, we both have restraining orders on previous boyfriends, and we all know both of us can put on a hell of a show
You thought cars couldnt see you if you stuck your head in the mail box
can't wait for January to be Over so I don't have to see all the fat resolutionists working out.
Im sure that doesnt mean its ruined... It was your bithday you get a free "im drunk at 7 am" card
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
you kept insisting that i was jake gyllenhaal and you were heath ledger.
I just realized I am holding a beer in 133 out of 134 photos of me on my facebook page.
Nobody is perfect
I'm at Waffle House wearing one of the paper hats in the other
My mom would probably be ok with my lifestyle as long as she doesn't see that photo of me doing bong rips in a Jesus costume.
I don't even want to go. i just want to be a hermit and live in a cave with an elephant that pisses vodka
what kind of roommate is she really? she wouldn't even hold my hair back.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
He shoved his balls through an egg carton and showed us a picture. They were surprisingly egg-like.
Tequila Tuesdays need to not carry on throughout the week. Having a sad Saturday
Just so you know.. If you ever cheat on me, i will cut your dick and fingers off and post them as my cover photo on Facebook. Love you.
What did we do last night and why in the fuck were there carrots in my pocket?
She just kept feeding people pretzels and sayying "You're such a good goldfish."
you should just get a floor plan of your dorm and start checking off rooms.
Randomize