He fingered me while we both sang the fresh prince theme song.
Marry him
We just had the worst moment of our late twenties.... We just realized we are too old for the real world
she just announced that once she was paid to deep throat a light saber with a mint flavored condom on it. i'm speechless.
My mother's day gift to my mother is to promise never to tell her 95% of the stories I've accumulated in my life.
It was the first time I had seen his penis when it wasnt hard. It just looked so vulnerable and a little bit depressed.
he drunkenly pissed himself on the deck, in the bathroom, and on my couch within the span of an hour
its like an avodart commercial...maybe he has a growing problem
After having to meet his mom half naked, running into the tree in front of her didn't seem so bad.
Had to go to the urgent for a physical and I gave them my fake. Nurse was a sport though
Just come get me. Somewhere there's hobo that's going to want his dumpster back, and I kinda want to be gone when he discovers the vomit.
The doctor basically called me a dirty dick.
I just watched a porn called gay of thrones and I think I've reached a new low in my life
I feel bad for her. If you sacrifice and have a chubby husband I feel that you assume he's not going to cheat on you....
Yea he was still drunk. He wore a Toga to his job interview.
After 8 hours of circus trick sex, his parents are both hugging me and kissing me on the cheek asking when I'm coming back over. Score?
He told us when he was 10 he started shoving bars of soap up his ass for pleasure so i winked at him
Randomize
