why am i having a flashback about somewhere we were this weekend with music videos playing? Spike jonze brothers place?? Help me out
There's a technique?! I just slide my tongue around
Just got mistaken for a cardboard cutout ad in line at Taco Bell. New low?
I don't think he's ever woke up with a paraplegic stripper sitting on his face before.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
Don't play hard to get, I've seen some of the girls you've slept with.
The only reason I give him head is because I know i'll get a back rub.
wow.
But it's a REALLY good back rub.
That's your penis' name. I've always referred to it as Alejandro secretly.
You put Smirnoff in your grape juice and called it communion...
After 3 dates I think I'm failing at painting the "sweet guy with a future" picture and more painting the "this is the guy to call when you've run out of options and want to get fucked in half drunk to forget about it" picture.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
The boat wouldn't start, so we brought it back to her house and we've been sitting in it in her driveway for the past 5 hours drinking beer and yelling at peoplee.
no. i discovered the *exact* amount of drugs i need to do to understand calculus.
I screamed so bad because I thought he was going for my sandwich forgetting it was in my hand
I think I just got drunk texted by my psychiatrist
I would just like to say that I was the one who said that we should find scissors, when they were cutting your hair with a kitchen knife. I am responsible.
I still feel bad for it, even though I technically only videotaped it and helped will to distract the questioning neighbor
He told me their parents think of me as the "drunk friend"...oddly enough, I'm ok with that
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