First rule of pills: If you can't remember what it is, take half.
Its a sad when the highlight of your day is flicking a booger and actually getting it to stick to your computer monitor.
She threw up everywhere and is crying about a fictional character who died on Grey's Anatomy
He kept buying me shots of tequila. I decided to just save myself the half hour of toilet hugging and tell him straight up that I intended on sleeping with him. We got Tacos on the way home with all the money we saved.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
For my job application I just put "community gardener- personal business" for my previous work experience in place of the neighborhood pot grower/distributor
Slept on the counter again. Mom covered me in an apron.
walk of shame into the pharmacy with a busted up chin and laughing the lady at the counter rolled her eyes at me when I asked for the morning after pill.
some fat dude with wolverine facial hair just walked out of your room with a snuggie. explanation needed.
I just used my glow stick from the dance to find my way in the bathroom to puke. Who wants me on their corporate team
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
I am still sore from last night. I can't wait for you to meet my parents.
He asked me what I wanted the cake to say and I then asked him if "I'm sorry for throwing up in your bed last night" was too long. He said it was...
I hate vagina strikes, but I must not stray from my path. My boyfriend will know the true meaning of blue balls.
Was the picture of her twerking on a fake plant sufficient?
pretty sure I blew his mind with the sex last night. He repaid me with a five minute conversation about power rangers.
Someone left a middle school yearbook here. I recognized one kid from banging his mom last year.
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