YOU GOT EVICTED FROM A TRAILER PARK!?!? WTF!!!!!
wow, so sex, not that great its like masturbating with a warm towelette, like the kind you get at a japanese restaurant
Is it weird being in the house without any roommates?
Nah, just masturbating louder
well she hit her head and had a concussion. i had to make out with her to keep her awake.
In a cab. Towels everywhere. Confused.
He insists on falling asleep with his penis between my buttcheeks. He says its his "home".
Goldenshlager is a hell of a drink. And these are the adventures ur missing out on w me. I gave someone a bath Emily. A BATH.
Awkward
Can't say I wouldn't let it happen again.
I feel like we need a drunken piñata bash with your face being the piñata and my hopes and dreams being the stick
Just remember, Dont make worse choices than american flag pants to your own birthday party
My dog got laid yesterday. Some lady came over with her husky to breed. He did it like a champ. I was so proud
Everything was cool till you started pissing while standing at the bar
I just pawned the ring from my ex boyfriend to replace the ring I lost from my current boyfriend. #thanks
she walked through the crowd, completely naked, slapped a pool attendant in the face and stole the towel he was carrying. she used it to dry her hair.
don't bring your nerd jargon into this conversation about my naked body
excused from jury duty. THAT hungover...
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