i told him i was on my period. he said, and i quote "can we not just lay down some newspapers or something?"
I just drove by a church. On the sign out front was written 'crocodile cock'. On both sides.
plus shes a stripper, ive been with strippers, if you fuck this up your penis will never forgive you
I'm sober in pajamas at a bar. Nothing is ok about that statement.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
So to distract myself from jackies vomiting, im making up a story in my head. It's called the little penis that could
He returned my car yesterday. Found a duffel bag with beef jerky, condoms, and a handgun this morning. Slightly concerned
I screamed so bad because I thought he was going for my sandwich forgetting it was in my hand
And as the acid sets in, he looks back at the shallow form he used to call his and whispers "3 pee pees strong"
I just stood beside an Amish man and bought Cocoa Krispies and tampons.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
We're lying on the pavement outside of the college. No one has asked if we're okay. I think they all understand.
Saw a thong on the yellow lines of the street when I left this morning, are they yours by any chance?
Im goin to jail bro ill talk to u sun
I'm pretty sure my therapist gave me the green light to fuck him.
Dude someone puked in a bowl n put it in the fridge. I thought it was salsa! Who does that?
Come home... I’m drinking and playing with knives
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