we were having sex in the bathroom when his aunt knocked on the door
and rather than go out and meet her, i climbed out the window. so now she thinks he was masturbating and moaning his own name in a really girly voice
She offered to make me a fruit roll up salad for breakfast...I'm not sure if that's the coolest or weirdest thing ever...
we were fucking and all I could think about is how my silly bands were glowing in the dark.
There are walks of shame and then there are walks of what the hell is wrong with you.
Judging by the amount of alcohol multiplied by the amount of her exes here, tonight will be ending in tears.
Threesome in a minivan. New low
Dont tell her I prefer to have an aura of mystique surronding me and my penis.
After arriving 30 minutes late, he slowly walked to his desk and halfway there he just falls over like a tree and passes out. I now have some sort of proof as to how awesome that night was.
If I hid at school to avoid the cops, is it fleeing and evading or just being a good student?
What's his name?? He crossfits 6 times a week, works in finance & is into the occasional felony class drug. His name is irrelevant in order to know if I wanna bone him again.
Would you still love me if my nipple fell off?
So my booty call knows your bf. Apparently they were in jail together
I'm too depressed to masturbate. This election is the worst.
Just called to hear your voice and talk about pizza.
We really gotta wear capes to the bar more often...
Randomize