yeah, but that could mean anything in Denmark.
She went to college and exploded out of the slut closet.
it was like she was tryin to eat my face and i was defending myself with my mouth
i hope kanye doesn't show up to patrick swayze's funeral. " i'll let you get back to your funeral in a minute...but michael jackson had the best death of the year. just sayinnn ".
I tried calming him down but his eyes are rolling to the back of his head and he's yelling "COMA WEED!"
Yeah, I probably scared him away when I drunkenly told him we'd have beautiful children
It's taken me 5 years and 2 beers to finally realize that maybe he isn't the dude for me. Also, that picking your major should be done sober, lest you find your self an art major.
We were just talking bout putting on helmets and going fo a car ride just to see how ppl react. I will def fit in here haha
i broight you flpweers amd vodka. open yoir bask door
Ice skating? Did you see me last night? I don't even know where my socks are
Last thing I ever expected to say, "Get your finger out of my ear or I will stop sucking your dick."
I just went to add a song I had never heard before to my "high as fuck" playlist and it was already there.
I have a bottle of vodka wrapped in a leg warmer in my purse. This is what it takes to get through Christmas with my family.
What the hell happened to the sandwich meat I just bought?
After you smoked, you made 8 ham sandwiches.
Guess that explains the mysterious disappearance of the bread...
should i feel bad about fucking you on my front lawn the day before you set me up with your best friend?
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