CONFIRMATION: i wiki searched it and Justin Bieber is 15 not 13. so i dont feel like as much of a pedofile now....
Hey was my sperm eye the same day I crapped myself?
96 perecent sure i just took a shower with socks
her facebook's as public as her vagina
What's bad is when she said "what hobo did you steal this dick from?"
You know, I never expected to find myself with a roommate who I'd have to ask not to have sex while I'm in the room. And yet, here we are.
why is it ever time u get laid i end up having to clean something twice? you have no idea how hard it is to wash smugged ass cheeks off the counter
there not mine if that helps
Not much, just your average college male Sunday cleaning period blood out of the carpet.
Tell me you're kidding.
Besides scarred, I'm not much of anything right now.
The birthday girl is bringing her own barf bucket, it is going to be a good weekend.
When I said 'i love my boyfriend' I didn't mean 'send me a picture of your penis'.
according to last night, I underestimated the size of my mouth and the possibilities of what can fit into it.
Well I was kicked out of the bar and woke up on a picnic table. I'd say the night was awesome!
We were taking body shots by lunch. I love college.
I just found (and ate) a chunk of a reese's that fell between my boobs. Problem is that I finished those off 3 days ago in a drunk induced sob session... Has it really been that long since I changed my clothes?!
I feel like i'm being yelled at when you type in all caps.Did you just have bad sex?
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