you were grabbing cocks left and right
you literally grabbed sam's dick and said, "who's cock is this?!"
Freshman orientation day on campus. Dear diary, JACKPOT.
The look your mother gives you when she sees you masterbating on web cam is unlike any I've seen before, but this is a case where, I would say, ignorance is bliss.
nothing i could have done in life could have prepared me for walking in on her SHITTING on my rug.
Needless to say there is no second date for this girl.
yet...
I woke up with a crunchy, pink Pepto streak through my hair, no recollection of the last 6 hours of my night and the feeling that all the hotel's staff knew me on a first name basis.
She was giving you that "I really want to blow you but I have to act professional" look. Guaranteed
Probably shouldn't have worn my jeans covered in blood from last night to class.
I jerked him off and then punched him in the face for no reason. Typical evening drinking Sailor Jerry's.
HE'S turngign 18teen real soon.k
Excellent idea. Nothing says "congrats for resurrecting yourself, Jesus" like Greygoose at noon!
That kid i sell weed to just had his mom give him a ride over here she waited in the car while he bought a bag
We were gonna go out drinking tonight but she found out she's pregnant so are you free
I slept on her porch...in her dads handcuffs
LMAO. Stop. Men are such gentleman these days. I woke up with no one beside me and you got 6 cents
6 cents and no orgasm 💃🏻🎉
We are so blessed
Tonight is an "I'm lonely and single so I'm going to curl up in a warm, melatonin and vodka enriched ball in the corner of my bed with a cat." kind of night.
Randomize
