Trust me, I wear more condoms than socks. I wouldn't risk infecting my cock. It's my livelyhood.
he made me stop in the middle of the blowjob to turn the tv towrds him. i then proceeded when he stopped me again to get him the remote. fuck me.
i have essays due online every friday...im just going to write 'im hungover' for every one
i was the DD for the swedish students tonight. Got paid 23 dollars for driving 10 miles. gotta love ignorance and the confusion conversion brings.
What is wrong with this kid? He'll take ecstasy but won't take dayquil?
Also, I had a dream I had a ray gun and woke up holding my dick.
Guess who just hooked up with the cop that fingerprinted her?
okay when i look at this i can see it on the future news along with the headline "picture scandal involving senatorial candidate sexually harassing drunken idiot in what appears to be a pink room of pain"
She has the perfect pussy. Looks like a paper cut with a puff of cotton candy on top.
I feel like at this point in my life I should be dating someone who doesn't run out of all his money on Mondays and have to wait til fridy to buy his weed
well i don't NEED my liver but it's nice to have one when you're trying to have a good time
who the fuck is meatball and why is he telling you to nap on the bar
One of my favorite March activities is cropdusting people while wearing a kilt.
That car ride home was pretty awkward. Your feeling up the girlfriend to the guy who's throwing up out the window. Thanks for that.
It's very finicky. Like baking. or BDSM.
Randomize
