How am I suppose to look him in the face when I know a commercial lasts longer than he does?
whats the proper etiquette for returning a closet door to a random girl you met and do not know her name?
Making the executive decision for drunk you to not sleep in the lofted bed that has no ladder
I woke up with a Nike swoosh shaved into my chest hair. my friend got 3 stitches. my phone had a text that simply read "fuck you". I say it was a good party.
Next guy we share better have a little more dignity than that
You know what's soul crushing? Walking to subway and find out you were too drunk to put on shoes and being denied service.
Um. I literally have no words.
I am 48% hangover, 48% bruises and 2% fingers I'm texting with.
Just had sex in the darkroom, while a class was going on ten feet away. I finally have a good sex story.
we found him passed out on the baseball field with two 40oz and wearing a tophat.
Where did he get the tophat?
My mom just asked me if I knew what Buzzfeed was. Then said she's watching the second Magic Mike for the bodies. Please help.
My roommate just threatened to kill me with my own pan. Can I ever get away from the crazies?!
I just wanna suck his dick on my balcony ya know
Vodka for breakfast. With a side of Frankenberries. Don't judge me.
Anne is dead. totally passed out and was flat out in the street
Painted a stripper an elf costume. Her coworkers liked it. Now in a room full of naked strippers.
Randomize
