508, what difference does it make? You were alone, anyway.
i just pissed myself at work. maybe they'll buy the old coffee spill trick
Just took my morning after pill in the library
I've had enough of this chick, she wanted to cuddle after giving me a handjob. I feel like I'm in junior high
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
Sitting next to a girl in the computer cluster who just googled syphilis symtoms, started crying & got up and left. My life suddenly seems better.
im proctoring the SATs right now and im still drunk from last night. i really wanna tell these kids that this fucking test doest mean shit and they will just be constantly drunk once in college.
Already puke and ralleyd and dressed like a bear.
seriously my hangover is so bad I feel like my eye lashes make blinking a workout
Are you up yet? I really want to know if i tried sleeping in a field... i have the vaguest memory of trying to
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Do you think the police would frown on me opening a psych drug pharmacy on the side? Just to dispose of my drugs without polluting the water supply! It is for the animals!
He's ready to settle down, whereas I'm like "More shots please"
Between the deep breathing and nipple piercings , I thought I was in the twilight zone
Almost ran out to the street bowl in hand when I hear the ice cream truck pull up outside.
Everything about that text makes me proud to be your sister.
He's on the porch naked. Help.
so i went over to her house and we played crash bandicoot, ate calzones, and had sex all day. im in love.
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