Just bought a german beer stein with tuition cash. no regrets
dudes here are drinking wine, and not in the forgivable 'just doing this to get laid' way
my summer class's final was canceled bc it interfered with the world cup. he is giving us all A's on it. I love europe
i have my graded calc test (94%) sitting on my empty case of beer next to my desk. this is me winning at college.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
The night took a downhill turn when he started using a butter knife as a spoon to drink his cosmo
Sun* burn. But that sounds like wait.. Midsentence thought... It would be like swimming in a giant bowl of cereal.. Only I would be cereal. This is brilliant.
She kept telling me to calm down. I was on the floor with my eyes shut, not moving. In levels of calm I was one step above coma patient
My boss just sent an employee on an hour long paid break to pick up weed for our 'staff meeting' tomorrow morning.
And now I'm drinking leftover wine in the grad lounge because fuck my life
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Is it weird that the best sex I've ever had was to Barbara Streisand's Christmas album?
We just had an accidental Facebook titty pic scare.
He broke into my house because he missed me. Then ends the relationship because I'm the needy one. Ironic much?
I wanted to buy shoes but nothing fit. So i'm getting a vibrator.
I don't like pregnant me. I eat very large burritos, I don't like having sex and I can't even finish a Blue Moon.
So... I sharted on the plane. It was hard to maintain my composure and acted offended at the same time. I hate you for not cutting me off last night.
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