What do you think she thinks of us?
I think she thinks we're whores... but ya I think she likes us
You think the Elephant Man ever tried to pick up chicks claiming all his appendages were elephant-sized?
just found out i fit into magnum condums. this is going to be the best weekend ever
When i asked him what happened all he said was, the toucan... the toucan... over and over again.
No. No, there is no forgiveness for this. The only way I'm forgiving you for this is if you somehow convince your sister to have sex with me. In her car.
As an added bonus, you will have a "25 blowjobs a month" voucher, expiring thirty days after the first initial bj.
I just listened to "Eye of the Tiger" and did 5 shots to prep going over to see him.
Besides the kids on acid... I was the highest kid there
And all you did was hit on me and do things "for America", so you weren't judged heavily
There is nothing worse than the batteries of your vibrator dying on valentines day
After a crazy night, morning sex is just trying to find a position where you can thrust without getting seasick.
My 1st STD. I feel like there should be a cake for this.
First of all she starred talking about God which immediately killed my buzz
HOLY FUCK i just remembered we had bows and arrows and firecrackers last night
and flaming arrows and vodka
how did we not set your garage on fire
What the fuck were you guys talking about?
Lube wrestling.
Oh, makes sense.
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