i'm out of smokes so i just had an after sex popsicle. this might become an addiction.
dude on moped wearing crocs...somebody get this guy his man card back
you finished all 5 burgers, started crying tears of joy, and then claimed the tears were actually just 'meat sweats' from your eyes
Passive mediator is your role in this relationship. My role is dick punching arsonist
We found her on a strangers doorstep chanting "I know someone will let me in" it took 2 of us to drag her to the car.
Currently studying Econ, while waiting outside current booty call's residence for him to return from the strip club. This is your fault.
I've never been more scared for my virginity in my life. And I lost my virginity almost 6 years ago.
he told me he had a dream that he laid his head in my lap and silently gazed up at me. WHY AM I ALWAYS THE DUDE IN RELATIONSHIPS
This couch is so comfortable I can tell if it's like a waterbed or I pissed myself
I see your boobs were ready to greet the new year.
My dick has been in way too much crazy the past 2+weeks, but hey it feels good to fuck consistently again
Jungle juice breakfast? No? Ok.
Well I'm trying out this whole "not sleep with a stranger thing"
That's silly... just silly. And by silly I mean unrealistic.
Bachelorette party buss just rolled into down town. DTF, "horny hotties inside" and "show us your dicks" written on the windows....this could get interesting.
I thought he was hot. You know, in a “I’ve gone batshit insane and want blood for the blood god” sort of way.
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