i dont know what it is, i just found it in my pants.
Just saw a man in a wheel chair using his feet to push himself backwards through a crosswalk... good morning Atlanta
she's not even a shacker, she never made it inside. she's just a porch girl
video games are the ultimate cock blocker
we dont know what were doing after yet. first up we have 90 beers and a party kit and fun hats.
I was hoping we just happened to wake up naked and I hadn't fucked him.... no such luck.
her cat watched me eat her out... I would use the alternate term for both of those things but it's too weird.
I woke up naked this morning there was a baseball bat on the floor the bathroom door knob was removed and the floor was wet. This is why i don't do Tequila shots.
While he was going down his phone rang and he answered saying I'll call you later I'm eating.
I've created a drink called, "watching the sound of music with grandma." its straight vodka
I kept petting the scarves and telling customers to "feel that shit"
Stop drinking at work.
The thing is that despite the high paying career and the increased responsibility, my life hasn't changed that much. Only instead of blacking out on $2 wells at some dive I blackout on top shelf martinis in a suit. Oh and only on Fri & Sat nights. Being 30 doesn't suck as bad as everyone led me to believe.
He just remixed a spongebob song with 2 chainz..... Clearly I love him
Maybe he injected his testicle?
This guy on tinder just told me that he wanted to tie me up and asked me what I thought. I told him I wanted tacos
Randomize
