hook me up with the drugs dog keep up the good work
Her cooch smelled like a combination of bacon and sweat.
jersey shore drinking game rules must be edited. almost died. how is it possible for a person to say guido that many times
I have been drinking at the bar so long today that I literally just found a spiderweb from my leg to the bar.
THERE IS THE SEXIEST BEARDED MAN HERE. I CAME EVERYWHERE.
was his dick as big as our hopes and dreams?
How many times can I tell him that I wasn't expecting sex before he finally figures out that I'm just too lazy to shave?
also since I use google voice my ads in gmail switched to DUI services after this conversation
Fuck your 100 proof Hot Damn. Do you know what 100 proof vomit tastes like? Anger.
i dont trust my judgment anymore so im only going to fuck guys who can donate blood at the red cross. they have standards.
We're looking for the removeable roof from her Miata. Winner gets a 40.
HELP THE ONLY THING THAT'S HELPING ME DISTINGUISH BETWEEN THE TWO OF THEM IS THE DIRECTION OF THEIR WINKY FACES OMFG
I got a blowjob dressed with a t shirt sweatpants and a Fanny pack. Not kidding.
it's always good to have a friend that's a hairdresser, a massage therapist, maybe throw in a lawyer just in case, and always have a friend on food stamps
I'm just really glad SD weather is so erratic so I can get away with wearing a scarf in May to cover up these hickeys.
Randomize
