FIrst one done
How did it go?
I dunno I taled about women being treated wrong and quoted Ice T. So probably a "c"
FB needs to have a relationship status called...screwing my roommates bf..linking their names would be an easier to tell her!
josh has a chalupa in his pocket if you're hungry.
did you dip my ponytail in franzia? its the only thing i can think of to explain my hair right now.
Apparently Bin Ladens last act of terrorism is cock blocking me....
I had to help you off the toilet floor because you couldn't get up, then you threw your drink on the floor and just said "oh dear" really calmly.
Don't worry we will all be making bad decisions soon
That's the most comforting thing I've heard in months
We're going to catch a squirrel this summer
If I had to summarise my weekend I would do so using the words "horrifying romanian moonshine"
i just want to be sober by dinner like is that too much to ask
You're not stopping till I see you on the ground trying to hold on to shit
Guess I'll put him on my to-do list too. But closer to the bottom since we dated before. That's almost unethical.
seriously considering getting an electric blanket rather than sleeping with guys this winter for warmth.
Only great wives bring your dope to you when you are at the Cardiologist
I'm sexting with a 20 year old that has a foot fetish... This is what Sailor Jerry drives me to do.
Randomize
