I was hooking up with him in my car, he wouldn't stop with my nipples, I had to literally beat him off of me. He kept groaning too while he was doing it. Sick.
Mommy issues
I dont like him- his parents were home and he hid me in his closet like anne frank
Just saw truck nuts on a handicap conversion van
I hope his life after cheating on me is as good as Tiger's golf game is these days.
Wasn't a date. In exchange for artichoke dip I received a bj. And sex. It was a transaction.
All I wanted was a hug. You dirty, dirty whore.
Blasting venetian snares and drinking a beer. I love being an adult. It's like being a child but with beer for breakfast, better music, and no one yells at you.
I'm going to smoke the pathetic stems and miscellaneous particles that weren't good enough for all my other bowls because its all I have left. This is my bag's Rudy moment.
I couldn't drown my sorrows in an ocean of jack daniels. They may have scuba gear.
What does that mean when you have a child masturbating in your dream? Is that weird?
Last week in my political science paper I quoted the Mighty Ducks. This week, I compared the Constitution to a weird pickle law in Connecticut (by law, it's not a pickle unless it bounces). So, yeah, clearly I'm ready to be back to being a college student.
It was just a Craigslist hook up but she wore sweats. Where are the girls with class?
I feel like it could help stop wars and begin world peace and the continents can unite for one Monday because chicken fries come back today
I knew I'd like her from the moment she supported me messing around with my co-worker on my lunch break
Hey you're my best friend, I'm sorry I picked my vagina over my heart last night.
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