I wanna blow your doors off so bad right now.
Doors?
Rock your world. Blow you out. Skeet skeet.
I'll pay for our taxi if you let me makeout with the drummer and we don't leave RIGHT when the bassist does.
All I remember was yelling at him, "Its becasue of people like you that it took us so long to get to the moon!"
Judging that there's a photo of me getting head while sitting on a graveyard tombstone.....not good.
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I woke up and blew hamburger out my nose. That kinda night.
Not going to lie- I'm a little freaked out camping right now. This is one of those high activities you don't do by yourselves...or close to bears
We sent off fireworks off in the taco bell drive through. They're taking it way too seriously.
I feel like they've probably fucked. Like.. you don't just bring a bitch a Big Mac if you haven't fucked her.
It was all fun and games until she said "you're so pretty I wanna punch you in the face" and the proceeded to punch her in the face
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Have you considered sword swallowing? Something about that bj tells me you could make a it a career.
Just taxi'd to the airport holding a zip lock bag of my own vomit. Bachelorette success.
Soooo I think my neighbor just saw me masturbating on my porch
Its almost 1 am and u wanna get together and cry naked
I think I just saw my socks in the parking lot.. gonna keep walking
I don't wanna be 33 that's when Jesus died
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