I loved tuna sandwiches so much in grade school it was so embarrassing
Everyday all the kids would be like oh grosss whose eating tuunnaa
another moral hangover. fuck.
i'm three days dirty after drinking 14 hours last night and some other questionable behavior (hula hooping at a large concert, for example) i will just always bring the class. and the sluttiness.
I just wanna buy a tempur-pedic so i can drink in bed and not spill
I need to stop fucking people before I get to know them
I think I explained what happened in the voicemail. But I think I might have just cried and ranted about how cool osiris shoes are
he's just a really huge penis that sells weed
Dude I walked in to my house just to be handed a bottle of vodka by my sister. She then said i had 15 minutes to finish it. Moving into my parents place is the best choice I have made this year.
i just remember doing it on a pile of clothes while i heard the muffled sound of his friend laughing. then i realized we were in a closet.
Oh my god. He likes it up the butt. But loves womanly support. Omg. Its bad. Its bad. Ive had too much whiskey for this to be ANYthing except bad.
You know I love you more than life itself, but love has its limits. And so help me god, if you bail on me, I will fucking watch the last Game of Thrones episode without you.
I still don't like him. I'm also filled with alcohol, so I'll revisit the statement in the morning.
That amount of times your family has seen my boobs is getting ridiculous.
Bacardi 151 is like a past nightmare I'm still curious about
What happened?
Vodka. Vodka happened.
Randomize
