do all gilrs hav hair on thier vagaina ?
Don't drive home.
IM NOT LETTING YOU PEE ON ME IF THATS WHAT YOURE GETTING AT.
good news. it is gonna rain tomorrow so now I don't have to pay to clean the puke off the side of your car.
Yeah I tried to leave with 3 drinks and the bouncer wouldn't let me, I slammed all 3 right in front of him and football spiked them in the trash can
Who would win... a chainsaw pooping pterodactyl or a bear with machine guns for feet. big debate about this right now
He grabbed onto my boobs while slipping on ice then proceeded to drag me down with him I'm not predicting head in his future
Going to have to start putting down newspaper if puking the bed is going to be a habit
i'm drinking margaritas from a pouch...really dont think i'm in the position to judge anyone...
What is the appropriate way to inform him that I am TOTALLY down for break up sex?
Omg yes! I just found a random muffin! Don't question it. Just praise the miracle.
We don't have paper towels so I microwaved a spinach/egg sandwich thingy wrapped in toilet paper. Toilet paper. so that's how my day started.
WEED BROWNIES! He put weed in my brownie mix! And he got it from YYYYOOOOUUUU!
Look at the bright side mom. After 20 years dad is still capable of surprising you!
Shut up Max.
I just got dumped by my fuck buddy. Now I have to have sex with my husband.
My goal tonight is to be arrested by the Police Women of Cincinnati.
She got a boob job, dumped her husband, became a stripper, got a DUI in her Porsche and is now dating her lawyer
I’m making her my life coach if med school doesn’t work out
Randomize