Maybe i should go to church more so i can meet girls like in that song, you know, the ones that act slutty on every day but sunday...
ah, so the catholic church. i gotcha
I feel like someone was just looking at my memory and took out an eraser and was like "nope he doesnt need that"
I've thrown up so many times in the third floor bathroom of Baldwin that they should probably just go ahead and name it after me.
Pretty much gone. He was in the backseat and kept whispering that his "toes felt like pigtails"
This girl would not stay down. It was like night of the living dead. She kept on rising up to haunt anything with a penis
czant get you from the arport. sry i found the rum. dan sucks at rumpong jusrt so yo knoqw.
We were messing around at his place it was going fine until he said, "I'm going to cum, hand me the shot glass"
Where did you go?
I'm not really sure. They have flavored vodka. I like it and I'm never leaving. Ever.
our jesse-walt dynamic is actualy really perfect because i want to start a small time drug empire and you want to get high a lot its very accurate
You gave him that scrunchie you made and called it your "sex offering".
She used a candle as a shot glass.. A FUCKING CANDLE BRO!!
I'm gonna go take a shower so I can cleanly change into my drinking underwear.
its liver damage thursday
I’m appalled by how severely I lower my standards when I’m horny & impaired
She's the other freshman on this drunken voyage
Randomize
