he put his p in my v, then his p in my a, and then tried to put the p in my m? first, double dipping is rude. second, i'm glad he finished shortly after that, i'm afraid of where he'd try to stick it next. my ear?
new low: just stole a ciggarette from a bum sleeping on the side of the street.
ohh what kind?
Found my shoes and purse. They're all strapped together in my neighbor's tree. Need to borrow your ladder. Thanks in advance
And some old guy told me Jesus loves me and I laughed super hard and told him sinning is fun. Hahaha
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
She was the shot vending machine at the party. But free.
I just looked at a girl and was like what disease does she have? And then my mind caught up ohhh shes pregnant.
I'm not sending you pictures to jack off to. That's not what friends do
If I hid at school to avoid the cops, is it fleeing and evading or just being a good student?
alicia just called me and talked to me in "the eternal language of the dinosaurs" and then kind of roared and gurgled. what kind of 4th of july are you guys having?
the boozy kind. is there any other?
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
I found out his moms name, maiden name, profession, and office location, his dads name and profession, his home phone, picture of their house, all of his work profiles, and the cost of their house. All I'm trying to do is find his damn twitter
I just realized that every possible way I walk to campus I walk by the house of someone I slept with
I didn't have cash to pay cover at the bar, so I traded the bouncer a Krispy Kreme doughnut i had in my purse
I WOULD NEVER LIE ABOUT SOMETHING AS SERIOUS AS SABADO GIGANTE BEING CANCELED
Someone took a shit in the house somewhere and I STILL can't find it. I'm just going to move.
you were acting out moves from the wwe, in a dress. then you sceamed "you can't see me" and ran out of the apt.
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