i'm in his phone as sushi coochie
We're talking about addictions in class and there's a girl 2 rows in front of me on Farmville. Hello, example.
I don't know what part of vegas I'm in but its definately the wrong part
He's really hot. I think he's gonna be my reason to shave this winter.
Then he showed me his sketchbook. Every drawing was a hand in different 'fingering positions'. Dear JESUS.
I have invented a new sport: freshman-watching. I'm sitting on our porch literally dying watching the freshmen run around trying to find parties
in my defense, he kept drinking all of my water.
he had diabetes and you told him to stop being a pansy!
Hey so I just want to get straight to the point it was me who ate the last cupcake and it was your sister who I fucked last nigt
Turns out the old man beside me in the waiting room was dead, but other then that it was a good day.
Pretty sure I was impersonating Rihanna when I kept asking him what my name was while we were making out
I'm sitting on the toilet eating a taco... I feel like a female Elvis.
You were peeing off the rooftop and told everyone sometimes you just gotta go
If there aren't any tits where you are, you're doing it wrong.
dude i haven't had a solid dump since sunday and i still cant hear out of my right ear
FYI there's a girl here with happy daddy written on her tits
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