Me too!
I hid a 6pack in the microwave for later
I knew I liked you
This guy just came in and told me how he bought a clock for his cat so his cat can know when he's coming home...
i can barely afford taco bell don't think a baby is in the budget
They both told everyone they fell in a mud puddle
Oh they definetly fell in the mud, repeatedly, on top of each other
i think you're the only person in the world who masturbates to food network.
I am burnt. Have a black eye. Face dove into the grass and got pissed on. Time of my life. God Bless the USA.
I have 20 seconds to get my life together and look presentable.
I just don't know what he sees in my vagina...and that scares me.
On the way home she put on a necklace with her name on it and wrote my name in sharpie across my chest so that in the morning we could avoid the awkward Idk who the fuck you are conversation. Best. Girl. Ever.
I waxed the left side of it and was in too much pain to do the right side so my crotch looks like cruella devil
You did a body shot out of her belly button with a bendy straw.
I need to see you idiots before I go back to school. But we shouldn't snort Crown Royal this time.
So what happened at girls night? My roomate found me passed out locked out on the front steps of the house and it was raining. Yes low moment
never have sex with a mint flavored condom on. my vagina is on fire.
Randomize
