Its where this guy sticks a jar up his ass. Be prepared to be suspended between vomiting and cheering.
i convinced her that her period would come back if we did it doggy style
Just desperately used the "it's a boy" cigar I saved from my\nnephews birth to roll a blunt
if you don't go out with us, what are you gonna do? you're gonna go home and watch biodome and masturbate to texts from your east coast boyfriend and see the facebook pictures from the party when you wake up.
They just both started mumbling "i cant go home like this" "it's all over my face" "do you have extra pants?"
It was worse than when we pepper-sprayed my dick. I feel mislead.
i just won "most creative" category in the condom contest in human sexuality by licking it onto a cucumber. my feedback forms included three phone numbers, one with a Magnum XL taped to it
Did you pour a hundred fucking pounds of sand in my car last night?
lol... you weighed it?
I hate him and his pretentious your-sleeping-in-the-wet-spot look.
Power went out. She lit a candle and gave me head. Made some pretty impressive candlelight cocksucking shadowpuppets. Must be what porn was like in olden times.
Ok cuz s'mores night just turned into pina colada after noon and it will be mas fun
I'm in the power napping at parties stage of my life
I think it's a scientific achievement that I can make jelly that is 95% vodka so suck it up.
Chili is not acceptable fuck buddy food.
fell asleep while jerking off ln. woke up to my hand in my pants and my cat crawling all over me
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