kristin has been a bad kristin
jersey shore has given me a vivid depiction of what things will be like for me once i get to hell
All i remember was he was wearing billibong pants... well actually my mom found that out for me.
Is it a bad thing I remember to take my birth control when I stumble across guys I've had sex with on facebook?
If i ever start ordering tequila again please tackle me to the ground and steal my wallet
I think I'm just going to up-end a bottle of wine and look through pictures of what my life used to be.
She was drunk and naked on our couch, sweating and masterbating to SNL. We made eye contact and she didn't even stop. It's new-roommate-o-clock
DAMMIT Im supposed to be running a company not discussing dick piercings!
What was the point of renting a $600 trolley if no one even remembers going to the first bar?
My tongue is raw from licking all that salt with my tequila shots...happy cinco de mayo
That amount of times your family has seen my boobs is getting ridiculous.
I don't think my professor is going to remember the Halloween party... or the fact that he made out with a priest.
Would you think less of me if I were eating pizza on the toilet right now?
He is in my tree wearing full on scuba gear ... Get here asap.
Hot fire fighters installing my closet. Don't know how to go about this. Gonna nonchalantly take my shirt off and see what happens..
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