I always feel awkward when im sitting at home watching the price is right and the fat contestant get the gym equipment.
They are pre-gaming a trip to congress...not sure how politically correct the group is.
ill give you a picture of me naked for $5. im desperate.
She's legit crying about wanting more sex. Holy shit.
At what point were we discussing suction-cupping a dildo to the wall?
There is nothing scarier than watching yourself breathe in the mirror while on shrooms.
i just looked in the mirror i look like i'm about to film a PSA about prostitution
I made it with a guy dressed as Mitt Romney. I told him "you can't have my vote, but you can have my body"
We have such limited time together he literally sends me text messages that are like "I sent my roommates on an impossible quest, we have 15 minutes." it's that bad.
Bar selfie Saturday turned into bar nudie Saturday in a hurry. I need to delete my snapchat...
Multi-day drunkenness is to binge drinking as black diamonds are to skiing. They're tough and confusing and you hurt afterwards, but you did it and you probably got an alright story along the way.
that game of battleshots got way too fucking intense. why does the couch have burn marks now.
I had to try on three different bathing suits to hide my boob hickies
I am at a cat party and I just witnessed people lapping vodka out of a bowl for a contest. Lol
It really hurts to walk. Any idea what happened to my hip?
Randomize
