the sham wow guy got arrested for beating up a hooker.
and trust me i need no booty pop lessons
Fine. I'll sleep in my office
why is it that everytime a half black man enters something boring, it suddenly becomes sexy to people? golf? the presidency?
she texted him the burrito order while she was puking in the Del Taco parking lot...
If you dont, I will tell Dad you are gay.
Fine, and I will tell him you fucked his business partner
Previous statement retracted.
On my way home right now. I miss you. let's cuddle. whiskey.
you blew your rape whistle in his face every time he got near a girl till he left the party...
He was sucking my nipples then stopped, looked me dead in the eyes and said "im gonna cum for my babygirl"
Did i tell you my idea for my life plan? Not the one that involves stripping.
It's only slutty if you don't have his number. Unless there's a full moon. Then anything goes.
Omg. We have to workout today. I just looked at myself in the mirror and thanked a god I don't believe in for drunken boys and dark rooms.
I just want to go home and eat bagel bites in my underwear
I mean it's up to you where you want to sleep but I'm telling you you're going to hear us have sex no matter what room you're in.
Fair enough
You abruptly started screaming because they had and I quote “calamari on the hoof”
Randomize
