I know man...but i cant pass up a catholic school girl fantasy
Good thing I was dressed to impress in my "I went nuclear on my wings" shirt even the girls are making out and I'm still 7th wheeling it...
Well at least it wasn't the first time I threw up out of a second story window
The party got busted because you two got caught having sex on the neighbors trampoline, come on man.
It's not my fault you have a job and can't get drunk on Tuesday's. Don't take your frustrations out on me!
yo knit me an eyepatch. but also make it usable as a thong
I don't think a gay three way is the best way to confirm your sexuality.
I told him we could use my stove to make weed brownies, from that point on he kept reffering to me as "best pledge ever"
Oh I see how it is...you can snap chat the world your balls but I wear dinosaur feetie pajamas and I'm the "weird one"
sidebar: i fucked your brother last night
I am going to go back to drinking and listneing to Hanson now. Maybe crying. Or perhaps Full House reruns
My stuff that was at your place last night smells like doughnuts. I'm not even mad.
It kind if looked like a strap-on dressed up for Halloween.
He went down on me while i ate a whole 7/11 pizza. New level unlocked
About that photo of the cake you just sent. You do realize it’s on a glass table, right? We can all see your reflection in it, and you’re very obviously naked.
Randomize
