Paul doesn't remember going to the bar and slept on someone's porch...doesn't know whose porch...maybe near Howard U.
yes i saw that this morning. it was my mailbox.
this is a mass text: i just made a grilled cheese with an iron and pasta with the coffeemaker in the hotel room. bow before your new god.
I think you blew it when you asked her "Do you look good naked too, Or is it just the bra?"
Bad news. I lost my teeth. Good news. I can still take a guy home sans teeth.
Yes I was being legit. That's the only plant I want in my house. A growing penis.
I feel like his penis would have a weird haircut because he does.
Well I can cross being naked in a minivan off the list
I just want a man to crawl into my bed with me and never crawl out. Anti socialism at his best.
Well I guess I'll go shower now and wash all the stripper off.
Just killed a snake in my bed! And by killed I mean hit repeatedly with my fist. And by snake I mean a lump in the covers. And I pissed my pants.
Don't have sex in a tent there are so many opportunities for infections
Checking my Tinder matches as I sit here in the waiting room at Planned Parenthood. I can't be stopped.
If they start to date again I refuse to help her sext him. Helping my mom sext my dad is where I draw the line.
He told me that I should keep my socks on next time because he read somewhere that it'll help me orgasm...
Randomize
