My t9 writes chubies instead of bitches.
either way. win, win.
best thing about halloween? there are pumpkins to puke in EVERYWHERE!
Dude, she looked like the Canadian Slam Poet, neck hair and all.
there r dinosaurs outside my house i hear them
pretty sure those are just snow plows....go back to bed
You're just telling me nice things because you came in my eye.
I just want you to know if you wake up tomorrow morning and wreak of mustard, I was not involved.
No it was the best sex I've had in months. Nothing turns me on more than getting rid of a boyfriend.
I was afraid that she would smell her boyfriend's penis on my breath while we were talking.
well, the two that sent pics I've already been with, so at least its not just BAM HERE'S MY PENIS IN YOUR INBOX ENJOY THOSE MEGAPIXELS
But I just had this pork pâté. It was dick grabbing.
Happy Birthday. May your liver respect you, fat bitches neglect you, hangovers reject you, and AA accept you.
Babe, Have you see my pants?
Try Jay street in Brooklyn.. that's where I last remember seeing them.
Yeah you're weird. You once told me you would by me a house in the middle of sex. Like as you were thrusting.
Sorry about the nipples in that snapchat. It was meant for the Australian.
Dont be alarmed when you come homeand see a guy handcuffed to your bed. His name is james. Ill uncuff him when I get home
Randomize