so while trying to be a healthier drunk i discovered that putting airborne in natty is not an advisable decision
she was like a sexier Rosie O'Donnel
3 inches of snow, below zero windchill and i just saw a dude in a wrangler with no doors, shorts a beanie and burton snow goggles. God i love college in colorado
I don't know why girls would even talk to someone as drunk as I was.
In case you were wondering...putting everclear into a humidifier DOES get you really really drunk.
I suppose drinking a cosmo at lunch alone can't look good but I mean... sometimes it's just necessary
did you really just send me an instagramed dick pic?
If she wants experimental lesbian sex, i call dibs
YOU CHEATED ON ME WITH THE WOMAN THAT IS STAYING AT YOUR HOUSE. FORGIVE ME IF IM NOT THINKING YOUR A DEDICATED BOYFRIEND.
you start one little fire by the lake and the police want to talk to you all night...
GOVERNMENT SHUTDOWN NO RULES ICE CREAM FOR BREAKFAST woooo!
I just wanted to be the best at what I did even if that included sexing a whole fraternity or sorority ya know?
I achieved maximum drunk last night. It was pretty extreme. Woke up on a couch, outside, in a suit
I'm pretty sure "good advice you would give to a freshman for achieving success" isn't constituted by introducing them to your addy dealer...
it is my civic duty to ensure the success of our youth.
I just want to bone him one last time before he moves across the country with his new (average looking) girl friend.
Randomize
