you were going around the whole club telling people to smell ur purse
i forgot beer had calories. that would explain alot.
It's a line of coke at 10 a.m. kind of Saturday. Don't be a pussy about life.
I have a page in my 2010 scrapbook dedicated to pictures of his cock.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
the girl next to me at the bar JUST looked down at her vagina and said "im going to get you fed". if i come home alone tonight...i give you permission to cut off my penis
I'm promising sexual favors in return for his responsible life decisions. Now THIS is growing up.
i wasn't gonna shower then i remembered i slept in my own piss
UPDATE: WE WILL BE HITTING THE BATMAN PINATA WITH A SWORD
Going to a professional golf course at 2am to throw the flag poles like javelins
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
SORRY FOR THE CAPS. I DIDNT CHANGE IT IN TIME AND ITS TOO FAR TO GO BACK NOW. PS IM SUPER BAKED
I want to have sex with Will Smith. I guess I have a thing with 90s sitcom stars. Stamos, Joey Lawrence, John Goodman.
NO I WILL NOT SET YOU UP WITH MY TWIN WHAT THE HELL IS WRONG WITH YOU?!? JUST BECAUSE I WONT BLOW YOU DOESNT MEAN YOU CAN STALK HER AS A BACKUP PLAN YOU SPANISH BASTARD
Peeing in taco bell cups is part of the fun of going to taco bell
TRY TO UNDERSTAND I HAVE MAGIC POWERS HOLY FUCKING SHIT
I stole the butter cup cuz i brought home my rolls and chicken and didnt want the butter everywhere. I miss your body because its amazing.
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