I have a pretty basic diameter of my vaginal abyss. I'm sure it won't hurt.
i feel like after you turn 30 you aren't supposed to black out anymore
you want to go make fun of the strippers on try out night
i got kicked out last time for laughing
dude facebook disabled my account because im registered under a false identity. now in order to get it back, i have to prove that it's really my name. i sent them an email and had to sign it "Cordially, Lloyd Pancakes"
I think the phrase "baptist college" should be an oxymoron.
After he came all he could say was how great the lighting fixtures where in my apartment.
It's a system.. i get to hook up with them and you get to play words with friends with them afterwards.
I think 2012 will be the year I purposely put myself in awkward situations. Much like 2011 but really trying this time. Like fucking the little sister of a girl I already fucked and dating a chick that lives with her ex. It could be awesome or horrible.
By the way. I expect to test the theory of you running a mile drunk for memorial day.
So Monday we're lesbians.
Deal. This decision is final and any rebates on this will result in losing an eyeball.
I would like to apologize once again for rubbing your thigh with my hands and face for a very long time last night.
I'd go lesbian for $50 and a good phone case.
I did get to watch you pee, tho. That counts as another precious moment.
if he becomes president of the united states, I will tell EVERYONE that i took his virginity.
I was grinding with girl while I was eating french fries, and she turned around to hook up with me. She ate my fries.
Randomize
