Awesome. Ask her out.
Nope. She's got a detail of ed hardy security around her.
End of the semester and I banged 14 freshman. I'm like my own welcome to college orientation guide.
I FOUND THE PROF I'M GOING TO FUCKKKK.
dude ... she has a full length mirror in her shower, don't even tell me shes not dtf
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
Of course he got arrested. He was wearing a toga. Even Tom Hanks couldn't act sober in a toga.
She finally woke up and said, "Me- nothing, potato peeler- 1." And rolled back over.
Like what kind of adult things? Whats more adult than drinking at 2pm on a monday?
Walking down the street at 11 pm dressed in bubble wrap. Why is the bar so fucking far away??
I'm not sending you pictures to jack off to. That's not what friends do
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
soo...what's the appropriate way to ask to come over and take your S&M lingerie out of your ex's apartment? big weekend planned, kinda need it.
Dude there is a stripper at my door saying she has my birthday present. She knows my name...but it's not my birthday...
God works in mysterious ways my friend.
Just letting everyone know that I am still alive after last night. On a related note, this is the 15th "I'm not dead!" mass text I've sent. You've got to celebrate the little things.
I owe you an apology, I was appointed captain of this sexy fuckship and I fell asleep at the helm.
Are ropes allowed in during conjugals?
She threw her burger out the car window last night. My vegan neighbors were not pleased but I’m pretty sure I saw a for sale sign go up on their lawn so I owe her one.
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